What I wish I wrote (Unofficial Hate #4)

Doing online applications for business' is the most annoying process I know. The main point is when they ask why I want to work for them or a short personal statement to support my application.

I'll make it nice and simple for them.

Money. I want your fucking money, and I want to use it for my own gain. Like every fucking person in the world.

Here is what I wrote first:

The fact that you require a personal statement alongside my credentials to support my application is ludicrous. What is the point of going through when applying for a low paying, low respected, no future careers as a sales advisor. Would it be better if I record a blood sacrifice and posted it to the HR department in Gloucester, where I strangle a chicken and make a vow to Satan to bind my soul with the economical enterprise that is your company? Why do you require this much convincing, businesses such as yourself should stop convincing yourselves that working for a business means you are a fanatic convert to the point of evangelical cashiers at Tesco. You are asking people to do a mind numbing job, this is a matter of respect and a completely lack of humility on the side of businesses.

I did not send that, I wanted to though. The next time some company requests that, well, I think I'll send a better draft of this.

Fucking bastards.